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Friday, October 14, 2011

Just kiddin' kindergartners

At four years old:

Edison trips and scrapes his hand. The teacher consoles him and says, “It’s all right, Edison. We’ll just wash it and you’ll see that it’s all right.” “No!” cries Edison “It’s broken!” After some thought, the teacher says, “With this Band-Aid though, it’s not broken anymore. See!” And Edison smiles. Thanks to the maker of Band-Aid. Teachers are fixing “breakages”.

The children are allowed to share a mat on the floor and play during their free time. Adam shares a mat with Anton and plays with dinosaurs while Liza shares a mat with Nick and plays with farm animals. Adam, however, tends to “walk” his dinosaur from his mat to that of Liza (who has started complaining about it), so the teacher intervenes and says, “Adam, this is the mat of Liza and Nick and that is your mat with Anton. Where should you be playing?” “At home,” Adam says. Yeah, right.

At five years old:

Teacher: I’m a grandma, too.
Student: No, you’re not.
Teacher: Why do you think so?
Student: Because you don’t walk like this. (She stoops and pretends to walk slowly with a stick.)
Teacher: Well, I don’t have to be very old to be a grandma. Look at Mandy’s grandma, she’s younger than me.
Student: Why? How many are you?
Teacher: You mean, how old I am?
Student: Yeah. How many old are you?

The teacher brings her laptop to class for the first time. Brenda approaches her with her usual big smile and sweet voice, “I like your little computer. It’s a girl computer. My Dad’s computer is big. It’s a boy computer.” Yikes!

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